PIF Writing Blues

Like many a seminarian
Whose views some say are contrarian
I've got to write myself in a box

The box's lines are well defined
though the question's been refined
to summarize the pastor's talks

Oh, I've got the PIF writing blues
Haven't you heard the news?
When you write a PIF on all the issues -
You're sure to get a call,
Just as long as you're Paul -
It's the PIF writing blues you can't refuse...

What's a PIF? you ask -
In short, it's a task
A resume and online-dating ad in one...

It's for churches and for pastors both -
To see what the other "hath quoth"
A service for Presbyterians

Chorus

With the multitude of churches
To find no smears or smirches
Is frankly, inconceivable

But remember, we're all people
And we fit beneath one steeple -
God connects the right and liberal!

Chorus


Oh, I've got the PIF writing blues
Haven't you heard the news?
Where you have to write on all the issues -
I may not be Saint Paul
But I hope to get a call -
It's the PIF writing blues I can't refuse